Unannounced Love

One last time we truly fall in love,

it is never careless like before.

We open the doors slowly,

through walls built from old heartbreaks.

We give our heart knowing very well

that it can break again someday.

Still, we choose to trust someone,

and that itself feels magical.

Their messages make us smile for no reason,

we wait hours just for one reply.

Even hearing their name somewhere

can make the heart race suddenly.

Love slowly enters everywhere,

not just the mind, but the whole body.

Every touch feels new and electric,

every glance feels like destiny itself.

We start dreaming too far ahead,

making forever from tiny moments.

One laugh feels like a promise,

one look feels enough for a lifetime.

But reality rarely follows our dreams.

Sometimes distance, family, or fate interferes.

And when love breaks, it does not only take a person,

it takes away the version of us that believed in forever.

The memories still stay alive inside us,

both painful and beautiful together.

Because love is not only a wound we carry,

it is also proof that our hearts once loved deeply.

By

Sanji-Paul Arvind

Harsh Reality of Loving Her

She did not just enter my life,

she returned

and my soul recognised her

before my heart and mind did.

The way she triggers my nervous system,

feels like she has been doing it for lifetimes.

With time, this knot has only tightened,

unable to loosen or to cut the connection.

I bear her pain like

it is my burden to carry in this life.

All the traumas, experiences, lessons,

feel as though they were meant for me to endure.

It seems she came to collect the debts

I owe her,

I heartbreak and pain I experienced,

felt older than this lifetime itself.

Perhaps I promised her forever,

in another life,

but still lost her.

Now my soul only keeps that promise,

by loving her

even when the story is already over.

So I accept, I forgive

and I am trying to release the bond I have with her.

Maybe I met not to complete the story,

but to liberate each other from it.

By

Sanji-Paul Arvind

When Tired of Fighting for A Place

I’m tired of explaining myself every day,

tired of trying to fit in everywhere.

How long do we keep proving

that we are good enough?

How long do we stay silent

while breaking inside?

The world wants applause,

fame, and recognition,

but the heart only wants

a little peace.

Not every victory brings happiness,

not every compliment is real.

Some things only make the face shine,

not the soul.

Not every battle is worth fighting.

Sometimes walking away

is also courage.

Sometimes,

the strongest answer is

silence.

The path of truth is often lonely,

but it is the path

that lets you sleep peacefully at night.

Let go of the need

to always be understood,

to always be praised.

You do not have to become the greatest,

you only have to be genuine.

You do not have to win every battle,

you only have to stay true to your values.

You were not born

to fight for your place all the time.

You were born to take your place,

quietly, with dignity,

without apologizing.

And when your place is earned

through truth and honesty,

no power in the world

can take it away from you.

By

Sanji-Paul Arvind

My Pain + Song

When my brain does not think of her,

it feels like it is being crushed..

When my eyes cannot see her,

it feels like they are being plucked out.

When my ears cannot hear her voice,

it feels like boiling oil poured inside.

When my nostrils cannot smell her scent,

it feels like they are stuffed with emptiness.

When my throat cannot speak to her,

it feels like I am being choked.

When her presence does not touch my skin,

it feels like it is being peeled away.

When my hands cannot hold hers,

it feels like they are being cut off.

When my legs cannot walk beside her,

it feels like they are being torn from me.

When my heart does not beat for her,

it feels like it is being pulled from my ribs.

When my blood does not feel her presence,

it feels like it is burning inside me.

When my soul cannot feel connected,

it feels like it is being separated from my body.

And in the end, I realize,

the one doing all this… is her absence.

By

Sanji-Paul Arvind

Listen to Song 1

Listen to Song 2

 

Conditional Emotions

She judged me by rules

that never really existed.

Maybe she created some just for me,

so she could keep me at a distance.

The most important moments of my life,

were the ones I lived with her.

But I never knew at that time,

that those moments would become sacred memories.

Her heart was like an ocean,

it was deep, it was beautiful

and merciless toward me,

and I drowned trying to reach its depth.

I walked away from her,

the very person I spent

my whole life searching for,

and that realization hurts the most.

I only saw the version of her,

that she wanted me to see.

In truth, I never got the chance

to know who she really was.

She became too comfortable around me,

and slowly lost the intention to stay.

Moments with her felt emotional

yet somehow conditional too.

By

Sanji-Paul Arvind

I’m Admired, Never Accepted

People love the idea of me

more than the real me.

They praise the version

that makes them comfortable.

They care more about access

than connection.

They like having me around,

more than knowing who I am.

They notice my looks,

my job, my appearance, my social life,

but never my fears,

my thoughts, my strange humor,

or the silence inside me.

They admire what I survived,

but disappear when healing needs

patience, support,

and consistency.

I become the comfort person,

the one who listens,

the one who fixes loneliness,

until that role starts choking me.

People hold on to their own story of me,

instead of seeing me as a real person.

They want the appearance of closeness,

not closeness itself.

My independence threatens them.

The moment I change, speak up,

or choose myself,

they become cold and defensive.

They questioned everything,

my clothes, my career,

my body, my hobbies,my friends,

even the way I speak.

But no one stays when I am sick,

stressed, grieving, confused,

or mentally tired.

Maybe they only loved a snapshot of me,

not the living, changing person I truly am.

People love performers, not human beings.

They reward performance more than honesty.

So I stay admired, but never fully accepted.

By

Sanji-Paul Arvind

என் இதயம் செய்து துரோகம் + Song

பலமுறை,

நான் அவளை வெறுக்க முயன்றேன்.

அவளது மௌனத்தையும்,

அவளது தூரத்தையும்,

அவளது காயங்களையும் எனக்குள் சேகரித்துக் கொண்டேன்.

ஆனால் ஒவ்வொரு முறையும்,

என் இதயம் எனக்குத் துரோகம் செய்து,

அவளை இன்னும் அதிகமாக நேசித்தது.

காதல் எளிதானது என்பதற்காக அல்ல,

மாறாக, சில ஆன்மாக்கள்,

உங்கள் இதயத்தில் அவ்வளவு ஆழமாக நுழைந்துவிடுவதால்,

வலி கூட புனிதமாகத் தோன்றத் தொடங்கிவிடும்.

மேலும், வாழ்க்கை என்னை எங்கு அழைத்துச் சென்றாலும்,

எனக்கு ஒரு உண்மை தெரியும்,

நான் இனி ஒருபோதும் வேறு யாரையும்,

அவளை நேசித்த விதத்தில் நேசிக்க மாட்டேன்.

By

Sanji-Paul Arvind

Song

I Wait for Her Dreams

One night, within a dream,

I saw her smiling, really happy,

and for one small moment,

everything in the world felt right,

I stood beside her,

like I belonged there,

as though it was fate itself

had finally shown mercy to my heart.

Her aroma felt like fresh rain,

her voice gave peace to my silence,

and the sparkle in her eyes,

brightened the dark places

inside my soul.

The way she looked into my eyes.

made me feel weak,

like the world existed

only for the two of us

inside that short dream.

I wished I had never awakened that morning,

I wished that night stretched forever,

because in that dream

she was completely mine.

But when I opened my eyes,

reality hit me hard,

and my heart became silent for a moment

it was empty with her absence.

Yet even then,

I prayed for the dream to return,

just one more time.

So now, every night I wait to sleep

the way lonely souls wait for miracles,

hoping she will find me again

in the only world

where I still belong to her.

By

Sanji-Paul Arvind

Song: https://suno.com/song/718b5937-0bd3-4bf9-8e1c-8f90a0fcda99

When My Comfort Became Discomfort

When I met her,

it felt electric.

She looked perfect,

and said all the right things.

She was warm one day,

and went cold the next.

I overthought her constantly,

anxious and addicted.

My heart whispered,

"Maybe this must be love".

But the rush wasn't love,

it was recognition of the past,

a nervous system remembering chaos.

Maybe I mistook anxiety for excitement.

Everything about her felt like passion.

Was it intimacy or intensity,

I could never understand

because they are not the same.

Sometimes she made me feel safe,

other times she kept me guessing.

Maybe I never feared love itself,

only the absence of chaos.

The tragedy is,

people don't always recognise healthy love.

They don’t know what to do

when peace finally arrives.

Maybe her body rejected it,

because her mind said "too easy"

not passionate enough.

Maybe comfort felt unfamiliar,

and peace itself became discomfort.

By

Sanji-Paul Arvind

My Love For Eternity

My love is not measured

by closeness, commitment, and continuity.

Time itself cannot validate it,

it is intense, uplifting, and eternal.

My love was never about possession,

but awakening.

It exists beyond physical presence,

and does not depend on togetherness.

My love imprints itself upon awareness,

it lives in memory and intention.

When love is genuine,

distance cannot weaken it.

My love carried no contracts,

no conditions, no claims.

It is free from the fears

of loss, abandonment, or replacement.

My love allowed freedom,

even when freedom led to separation.

Our bond did not fit social norms,

so, no rituals, no public approval.

My love does not require validation

from society to be real.

its truth was proven through devotion,

not ceremony.

My love is an inner experience,

not a social performance.

Remaining together for appearances is not love,

living truthfully, even when misunderstood, is.

My love is complete now,

because I do not possess her.

It fulfilled its purpose,

by transforming me,

and not by securing her.

My love was never meant

to anchor two people forever.

It wished only

to leave eternal imprints upon her soul.

My love will not fade with time,

because it was never depended

on external conditions.

Its true measure lies not

in how long we remained together,

but in how deeply we were transformed.

Some love stories survive as memories.

Miine will live for eternity.

By

Sanji-Paul Arvind

Listen to Song

The Stranger Within Me

After her entry into my heart,

there is no more room for anyone else,

now I have marked "No Entry".

The moment she passed through my heart,

it felt like a volcano burst inside me,

and in its fire,

I am melting more every day.

I only wished to walk with her

through her good days and bad,

and I wished those days

would never end.

I wish to become her bed

where she rests each night,

so, I could watch over her

every single day.

I wish to become her clothes

throughout the day,

so I would remain close to her

all the time.

When she came into my heart,

another person was born inside me.

He is part of me,

but behaves like a stranger.

He keeps thinking only about her,

and does not give me my own time,

It feels like that new version is staying,

and the real me is slowly getting lost.

By

Sanji-Paul Arvind

Listen to Song

If The World Knows About Her… + Song

If the bees ever know how sweet she is,

they will stop going to flowers again.

If the butterflies ever feel her fragrance,

they will keep flying around only her.

If the birds ever hear her cute voice,

they will praise and sing only for her every morning.

If the trees ever know her comfort,

they will wish to rest in her shadow.

If the stars ever see her shine,

they will stay above her all night long.

If the winds ever feel her breath,

they will always stay close to her.

If the sun ever feels her light,

it will never want to set in the evening.

If the moon ever knows her charm,

it will glow forever just to see her smile.

If the oceans ever know how deep her heart is,

they will feel small in front of her love.

If the volcanoes ever see her anger,

even they will calm down quietly.

If women ever see her beauty,

they will ask her the secret behind it.

If men ever know how pure her heart is,

they may even start wars for her love.

But nobody can truly own her,

because she feels like a part of nature itself.

As if God sent her to earth in human form,

only to make my heart fall for her.

And if the gods ever come to know her whereabouts,

they may send an army of angels

just to take her back to heaven.

And if she ever comes to know

that I wrote all this for her,

I still don’t know

whether she will smile happily…

or get angry and never read again.

By

Sanji-Paul Arvind

Listen to Song

A True Love’s Story

In today’s world, love looks nice,

Happy photos, smiles so bright.

On every phone and everywhere,

Love looks easy, soft, and fair.

People think true love means this,

Only hugs, smiles, and sweet bliss.

No heartbreak, no tears, no pain,

No fights again and again.

But real love is not like that,

It has hard days, this and that.

There is confusion, fear, and stress,

Sometimes love feels weak and less.

Still true love does not just go,

It learns to stay and slowly grow.

Through every problem, every fight,

Two hearts still hold each other tight.

Love is not someone perfect and fine,

With perfect words all the time.

It is standing strong through every flaw,

With care, patience, and love in the heart.

When we stop looking for perfect life,

Love becomes gentle, warm, and nice.

Less about ego, less demand,

More about walking hand in hand.

True love is not a perfect tale,

Not always happy without fail.

It is two simple hearts in life,

Choosing each other through every fight.

By

Sanji-Paul Arvind

The 4 Wives of a Man, By Buddha

In life, every person has four wives,

Walking with us in different phases.

We think all will stay forever near,

But slowly the truth becomes very clear.

First wife is our body and appearance

We take much care in every case.

Good food, nice clothes, comfort and style,

But the body leaves us after a while.

Second wife is money and wealth,

Property, gold, comfort and health.

We work day and night to earn more,

But after death, it stays on the shore.

Third wife is family and friends,

They support us till life ends.

They cry and pray when we are gone,

But cannot travel where we move on.

Fourth wife is our karma and deed,

Every good and bad little seed.

What we do in life every day,

That alone follows on the way.

Good actions bring peace and light,

Bad actions make the future dark like night.

At the end, when all things depart,

Only karma stays with the heart.

By Buddha

A Festival for My Emotions

I fell deeply for her,

and my mind turned suddenly

into a busy festival of feelings,

sparks of thoughts lighting up

like fireworks in the night sky.

Whenever she came near,

my whole body reacted,

my heart began to dance

to a rhythm I could not control,

as if it knew only her name.

Inside my brain, something glowed,

bright like a Christmas tree,

as if her smile alone

could light up my whole world.

I could not stop thinking of her,

again and again, without rest,

carried away in a feeling

that stayed in my mind like music.

It felt like my mind was changed,

as if I was under some strong magic,

and that magic was simply her,

her voice, her laughter,

her presence beside me.

Her happiness started to matter

just like my own happiness.

And for the first time,

I felt truly myself,

without any mask or fear.

Even ordinary moments

became soft and beautiful

when she was around me.

My heart kept saying quietly,

“this person is special, keep her close.”

Maybe nature made us this way,

to find someone rare,

to feel deeply, to care truly,

to hold close what feels meaningful

in this short life.

And somewhere between science and feeling,

between brain and heart,

I understood one simple truth:

love tries to be explained…

but still feels like a miracle.

By

Sanji-Paul Arvind

When She Touched My Wounds

Pain does not always come

wearing red flags.

Sometimes it comes as longing.

Like a spark that burns too fast

and leaves only ashes behind.

She touched my deepest wounds,

like a mirror showing me

the parts of myself

that still needed healing.

Every part of my body

wanted to run toward her.

But I slowly understood

that healing is not found

in chasing chaos.

What I felt for her was real,

but true love is not a performance.

Not a puzzle

and not a prize to win

by shrinking myself.

I wanted to become someone

who could truly receive her love.

Real love is not dull,

It is peaceful.

I wanted to become a better person,

someone who could receive her love

without fear

without feeling it is too much,

not enough

or about to disappear.

By

Sanji-Paul Arvind

The People Close to Us

Most of the deepest wounds in life

come from people close to us.

A harsh word from a friend,

a small distance from someone we love,

or hurt from family,

these hurt the most.

Strangers do not stay in our heart,

so their actions pass away quickly.

But loved ones stay inside us,

so their words stay longer.

In human life,

happiness and sadness both come from relations.

When expectations are not met,

pain is born.

We expect

love, care, and understanding

from those we are close to.

When this does not happen,

we feel hurt and disappointed.

Many times,

pain is not only from what they do,

but from what we hoped they would do.

People close to us

show our good side and also our weak side.

When they ignore us, criticize us,

or argue with us,

it feels very personal.

That is why it hurts more

because the heart is attached.

Some believe

close relationships carry deep bonds from the past.

And through them, life teaches us lessons.

Not because they want to hurt us,

but because closeness itself

brings both love and challenge.

And sometimes,

the same people who hurt us

also help us grow stronger.

By

Sanji-Paul Arvind

The Prize of Her Peace

Memories of her

tie me down like chains.

I let her go even when every part of me

screamed to keep her.

I left so she can live,

so she could breathe,

so she could have the happiness

I could never give her.

When I see her happy with someone else

every nerve inside me

wants to pull her back.

But if I do,

I know I will ruin her life,

Every smile she shares with others,

cuts like glass through my heart.

I live in a paradox,

wanting her close,

while knowing if she stayed

it would destroy her peace.

So I walk away, carrying the weight

of a love that I can never have.

My love turned inward,

eating itself alive.

I desired the unattainable,

hurting again and again.

Sometimes I wonder

if I’ve made a pact with chaos,

Destined never to find peace

because I keep chasing

what was never meant for me.

My own heart became the enemy,

it pushed away the right person.

Because it was scared,

because it was broken.

I loved someone

who could never truly be mine.

And I continued loving her

even while it destroyed me.

I am surviving without her,

and hating myself for it,

every second of every day.

By

Sanji-Paul Arvind

**Do not judge my life based on my poems; My Poems and my life are 2 different things.

The Seed of My Love in the Soil of Her Heart

The person I loved

did not arrive quietly.

She came like weather,

disturbing my inner world.

All ordinary moments felt charged,

even her absence had a presence in my life.

I keep asking myself,

"What does this mean"

But it was not just a thought,

my feelings were real.

It did not feel like guidance,

but something close to recognition.

Like an unfinished longing

finally found a face,

Like an old wound healing,

after hearing its name spoken aloud.

But what feels sacred,

maybe only be familiar pain

dressed as beauty.

My heart was honest,

but it was not clear.

My desire turned fire

into a home I longed for.

A quiet sadness remained,

she was not the one,

who gave me the most dramatic feelings.

She did not leave me breathless,

but she left me settled.

Maybe my heart

had been trained on chaos for too long.

Can my love hold truth,

time, and reality?

A seed may love the rain,

but it grows because of the soil.

So, I have planted my love ,

like a seed in the soil of her heart.

I do not know

if it will bloom one day,

or quietly perish unseen.

By

Sanji-Paul Arvind

**Do not judge my life based on my poems; My Poems and my life are 2 different things.

My Love in Other Worlds

I try to reach other worlds,

during my visit to my dreamland.

to see if we are together,

in any one of them.

Where we live under one roof,

we laugh, we fight,

we argue, we go quiet,

and then we found each other again.

Where I hold her hands firmly,

while walking down the road,

in the park, while watching a movie,

everywhere she goes, she holds my hand.

Where we eat together,

I cook all her favorite meals.

I make her bed and tuck her in beside me,

with kisses of goodnight dreams.

Where I hug her while she sleeps,

watching her peaceful face.

She finds the world's comfort,

sleeping in my arms.

And I wish that even in those dreams,

I am with her, loving her still.

There are thousands of world's,

and perhaps we are together in many.

I only wish I could love her here,

more than in any other world

where we exist.

By

Sanji-Paul Arvind

**Do not judge my life based on my poems; My Poems and my life are 2 different things.