Rainbow is the Colour of My Love

Some people love in black or white,

Some stories live in shades of grey,

But my love shines colours bright,

Like a rainbow during any day.

Red is passion, strong, and true,

A fire burning deep inside.

Orange brings joy in all I do,

Where laughter stays right by my side

Yellow shines as friendships warm,

A sunny light that helps us grow.

Green cares through calm and storm,

A love that strengthens as we go.

Blue is peace and loyalty,

A steady heart through rising tide.

Indigo knows us, soul to soul,

Where trust and mystery coincide.

Violet dreams of all we could be,

Of change, of hope, of love making me whole.

All these colours live in me,

The rainbow beating in my soul.

Each colour speaks of deep emotion,

Showing all the shades of my love.

They form a bright rainbow like a devotion,

My love shines clear, this truth I prove.

By

Sanji-Paul Arvind

**Do not judge my life based on my poems; My Poems and my life are 2 different things.

Her Absence Follows Me

She became rude and cold,

even when I stayed calm.

She walked away like I was never mattered,

while I held her like she was everything.

She made me feel small,

so, leaving became easy for her.

She showed me as a problem,

and called herself the victim of my love.

My emotions are imprisoned in mind,

a prison I cannot escape.

Her heart was my goal,

to reach, my love was a tool.

She broke my hope with mixed signals,

and never understood my efforts.

When I tried to protect myself,

she thought I was hurting her

Every day that passes,

adds one more day of missing her.

But truth is, I lose one day,

from the life that remains to live.

I am not fighting her hatred,

I am fighting her absence like a retard.

Every silence reminds me she is gone,

But her absence follows me everywhere.

By

Sanji-Paul Arvind

**Do not judge my life based on my poems; My Poems and my life are 2 different things.

A Timeless Truth She'll Never Know

It feels like we’ve known each other from many live,

She felt so real, so true and close to my heart.

Some souls come to bring peace,

And some to ignite the fire within.

When I first saw her, something just clicked,

Like my heart knew her before.

That connection we had, it was strong,

Something I cannot explain to no one.

Now she is lives in my imagination,

Where she remains perfect and untouchable.

I tried my best to love her fully,

But maybe her heart was addicted to avoiding me.

Still I don't blame her for anything,

Maybe this was how it was meant to be.

Some things in life we cannot change,

No matter how much we want to.

My fate was written long before and sealed,

Destiny played its web around my life.

I cannot change what is already written,

Still my love whispers timeless truth.

Even today, somewhere deep inside,

My love for her remains.

Not asking for anything, not expecting anything,

Just loving, and praying for all the happiness in life.

By

Sanji-Paul Arvind

**Do not judge my life based on my poems; My Poems and my life are 2 different things.

My Love Chose Her

She could be loved by many,

But will she be chosen, the way I chose her?

She will find chemistry,

But will she find a person who can truly commit?

Being loved by others is just an emotion,

But choosing her is a conscious decision.

My love comes with intention and integrity,

Being loved is easy, but choosing needs effort.

My quietness is a proof,

That she matters, even if it is a burden.

I never wanted her to feel it,

But I wanted her to know it.

I would never judge her,

Nor expect her to be perfect, only real.

I never wanted to guess about her,

But I would be eager to know everything.

I have always given her time,

To talk about anything, even if it's stupid.

I lend my ears to all that she says,

Not to argue or judge, but only to understand.

All that matters to her matters to me,

Not only her happiness, but anger, and sadness too.

I will know her better only when she opens up,

And I have my whole life for that.

By

Sanji-Paul Arvind

**Do not judge my life based on my poems; My Poems and my life are 2 different things.

I Started to Like Missing Her

All her promises turned out to be excuses,

For she couldn't hold the truth of mine.

The longer her distance became,

The harder my connection grew.

The thoughts of her are stagnant,

And my love remains intact.

I wished to see the sunset with her,

But now my days have turned dark.

She will never know,

nothing seems same without her

And I keep smiling alone

Every time I think of her.

I have replayed moments with her every day,

And my favourite day will be when I hear from her.

I only wish my thoughts can travel,

So, I can send all mine about her to her.

And the best part of each day,

it ends with still missing her.

Now my favourite feeling,

That I eagerly wait to feel.

By

Sanji-Paul Arvind

**Do not judge my life based on my poems; My Poems and my life are 2 different things.

என் சோகக் கதை

மழையில் அழுதிட ஆசைப்பட்டேன்,

என் கண்ணீரை கண்டு மழையே நின்றது.

தீயில் கருகிட நினைத்தேன்,

என் உள்ளம் எரிவதை கண்டு தீயும் அணைந்தது.

அடர்ந்த காட்டின் நிழலில் நின்றேன்,

என் தனிமையை உணர்ந்து காடே விலகியது.

வானத்தை நோக்கி வருந்தி பார்த்தேன்,

நிலா சிரித்து — “நீயும் நானும் ஒன்றே,” என்றது.

மருந்து தேடி மருத்துவரை நாடினேன்,

“இது நோயல்ல… முடிவற்ற நிலை,” என்றார்.

“மண்ணாகும் வரை தொடரும் இது,

மண்ணே அதன் இறுதி மருந்து,” என்றார்.

பிரிவை தாங்க முடியாமல் மரணத்தை நாடினேன்,

“உன் வலியை விட இங்கு குறைவே,” என்றது அது.

கடைசியில் கடவுளை தேடி சென்றேன்,

என்னை கண்டதும் கடவுளும் கல்லாய் நின்றார்.

By

Sanji-Paul Arvind

**Do not judge my life based on my poems; My Poems and my life are 2 different things.

The Room She Built

The world holds one ocean,

only known by different names.

My love for her is like that ocean,

she saw me in different ways.

No matter where a river is born,

or how far its journey goes,

it finds its way to the ocean,

becoming its part of it forever.

No matter where she began,

and how she walks through this life,

one day she will reach my soul,

and we will become one again.

I miss her in every small moment,

throughout the day and all of night,

everything feels incomplete,

without her by my side.

I chose her in this life too,

to love her immensely,

even if it means,

she can break my heart.

When se came into my heartheart,

she built a room for us,

started decorating it,

and left before it was done.

The room remains unfinished,

weak, but still standing.

I tried to tear it down,

but couldn't.

Because she built it,

and even in its ruins,

I want to live there,

holding dear, all her memories.

By

Sanji-Paul Arvind

**Do not judge my life based on my poems; My Poems and my life are 2 different things.

In My Thoughts, In My Action and In My Words

She was not mine in this life,

I let her go, and I'm at peace.

I will try again in another,

as I always do, searching for her.

Her love stayed for a while,

like a wave that rose, then crashed.

But love does not disappear.

it settles, quiet and eternal.

My love for her was a gift,

like sunlight given freely to the earth.

I gave her all of mine to keep,

never asking in return, never regretted it.

I loved her because she mattered most,

because I saw something worth falling for.

My love no longer stays beside her,

it lives within her, where once I did.

One day she will feel a warmth,

she cannot quite explain,

like a fleeting dream or distant memory,

that will be me, still loving her.

I will miss her always,

feeling her absence in the smallest things.

In my thoughts, in my actions, in my words,

a piece of her remains with me.

It reminds me each day,

that what I felt was deep and irreplaceable.

And until the day she feels it too,

I will go on loving her.

By

Sanji-Paul Arvind

**Do not judge my life based on my poems; My Poems and my life are 2 different things.

The Fire She Created

I wanted her presence,

Stitched into my everyday life.

Not only I wanted her love,

But also a place in her soul.

What I felt for her is not a spark,

It was a fire burning within.

My love will never fade,

It is eternal, like time.

I did not choose her with words,

I chose her with my actions, my heart.

It was more than just love,

A connection beyond this world.

The fire within burns only for her,

Faithful, endless, and true.

My days revolved around her emotions,

the good, the bad, and the worst.

Now I stand alone after it all,

Blaming myself for what went wrong.

Searching for strength in a heart,

That feels torn once again.

She gave life to something new,

But died before it could grow.

When something dies inside,

Then we lose the fear of death itself.

By

Sanji-Paul Arvind

**Do not judge my life based on my poems; My Poems and my life are 2 different things.

Letting Her Go with No Regret

She worried about society,

Not the voice inside her heart.

My love did not end in togetherness,

It ended in letting go.

She was never meant to be held forever.

The way I loved her,

Was by leaving her in peace.

I did not hold anger in my head,

because love is not ownership,

It is understanding.

I did not leave because I stopped caring,

I left because staying would have hurt us both.

When I spoke my truth,

it sounded weak to the world.

So, I kept my pain, turning into strength.

She was a small lamp in my life,

Not bright like the sun,

not dark like the night.

Just enough light,

to show me myself.

I let her go without anger, without regret,

Though she'll never know

that I will always remember.

My goodbye was not for her,

But for the version of her I created within me.

By

Sanji-Paul Arvind

**Do not judge my life based on my poems; My Poems and my life are 2 different things.

A Monster, Thirsty of Her Love

When I was with her,

I carried her pain.

Now that she is gone,

I carry both,

her pain and the love that remained.

I buried the version of me,

that loved her without limits,

afraid that if he rises again,

he will forget the rules

this world survives on.

And what returns

will not be him,

but something wilder,

a monster, thirsty of her love,

something the world will not forgive.

Her pull defies reason

stronger than gravity,

quicker than metal to a magnet.

Even buried deep,

I feel her drawing me back to the surface.

If death stood before me,

and she stood beside me,

the soul would hesitate, lingering,

unwilling to leave,

the body she once touched.

I poured love into her,

like it would never run dry,

like one day she might look back,

and feels its warmth,

long after I'm gone.

I only hope she holds onto it,

even when I am no longer there

to witness,

what truly she felt

but never chose to show me.

By

Sanji-Paul Arvind

**Do not judge my life based on my poems; My Poems and my life are 2 different things.

Another Chance, Another Life

She thinks this is our first meeting,

but I have known her since before time knew her name.

This love wasn’t born here, its been carried

through many lifetimes and stitched into my soul.

Fate, destiny, and endless time,

souls remember their twins.

And I know she is part of my flame,

as she has been for so long.

There is a world without us knowing,

where my hands hold hers,

where we never had to say goodbye,

and are still laughing, choosing each other each day.

My love for her is true love and unwavering,

it will not fade with time.

It will wait patiently, across all worlds,

to meet her again, and again.

And when that moment becomes real,

our hearts won't collide,

they will recognise each other

as they did in the past.

Some goodbyes are only temporary,

for hearts that truly love will meet again.

Maybe this life wasn't meant for us,

So, its fine that I lost her.

I will wait for another lifetime,

for another chance to see her again.

And in that life, I only wish

to find her at the right time.

For

Sanji-Paul Arvind

**Do not judge my life based on my poems; My Poems and my life are 2 different things.

கதவை தட்டமால் வந்த காதல்

அது பெரிய வாணவேடிக்கைகளுடன் தொடங்கவில்லை,

ஒரு சிறிய, அமைதியான உணர்வுடன் மட்டுமே தொடங்கியது.

மெதுவாக விழும் ஒரு மென்மையான தீப்பொறியைப் போல,

என் இதயத்தை மென்மையாகத் தொட்டது.

சாதாரண மனிதர்களைப் போலவே நாங்கள் சந்தித்தோம்,

எதிர்காலத்தில் என்ன வரப்போகிறது என்று அறியாமல்.

அது சாதாரண சிரிப்புடன் தொடங்கியது,

முடிக்கவே விரும்பாத நீண்ட உரையாடல்களுடன்.

அவள் அருகில் இருப்பது மிகவும் எளிதாக இருந்தது,

நான் எதிர்பார்க்காத ஒரு அமைதியைப் போல.

ஆனாலும் நான் காதலைத் தேடவில்லை,

அது எப்படியோ என்னைக் கண்டுகொண்டது.

அவளை நான் ஒரு வித்தியாசமான கோணத்தில் பார்த்தேன்,

அவளுடைய மௌனத்திலும் சிறிய தருணங்களிலும்.

அவளுடைய வலிமை, அவளுடைய வலி, அவளுடைய மென்மை,

எல்லாமே அவளை எனக்கு அழகாகக் காட்டின.

நாட்கள் இனிய நினைவுகளாகக் கழிந்தன,

சிறிய பார்வைகள், மென்மையான அமைதியான வார்த்தைகள்.

சண்டைகளிலும், கோபத்திலும், தூரத்திலும் கூட,

ஒவ்வொரு முறையும் நான் அவளையே தேர்ந்தெடுத்தேன்.

ஒருவேளை காதல் இவ்வளவு எளிமையானதாக இருக்கலாம்,

சரியானதாக அல்ல, எப்போதும் எளிதானதாக அல்ல.

ஆனால் உங்களைப் புரிந்துகொள்ளும் ஒருவரைக் கண்டுபிடிப்பது,

ஒவ்வொரு கணத்திலும் ஒரு வீட்டைப் போல உணர்வது.

By

Sanji-Paul Arvind

**Do not judge my life based on my poems; My Poems and my life are 2 different things.

I Am Angry At Her

I am angry at her eyes,

that no longer look at me,

I am angry at her lips,

that doesn't speak to me.

I am angry at her heart,

that never saw my love,

I am angry at her hands,

that refused to hold and let go.

I am angry at her silence,

that echoes in my chest,

I am angry at my own soul,

that never lets me rest.

Yet in every drop of anger,

her memory still stays,

soft like a shadow,

following all my days.

And in all this burning anger,

one truth I cannot hide,

I still love her quietly,

with everything inside.

But now I turn to myself,

wipe these tears I hide,

If she could not see my love,

I will stand on my own side.

By

Sanji-Paul Arvind

**Do not judge my life based on my poems; My Poems and my life are 2 different things.

The Shape of My Absence

My love is not in closeness,

I chose her each day.

even when I couldn't hold her hands

or see her face.

I carry the weight of everything I never said,

for I loved deeply and still lost.

I gave myself until nothing remained,

trusted fully, only to be broken.

She took a piece of me,

that time refuses to return,

Her love for me is a divine melody,

that plays in the depths of my soul.

She noticed my anger,

but not the pain beneath it,

the wounds she gave, never heals,

the scars would permanently stay.

My soul feels heavier now,

my heartbeat softer, fat away.

I just flow with time

without knowing where it leads.

My silence is full of words,

my heart speaks of them, like thunder.

I hope my absence is visible,

and the space I left still remembers me.

By

Sanji-Paul Arvind

**Do not judge my life based on my poems; My Poems and my life are 2 different things.

The Emptiness She Left Behind

It’s strange, she walked into my life,

and suddenly she is gone forever.

I never noticed the space she occupied,

until the moment she left it empty.

My world felt shattered,

even the smallest things feel heavy now.

Her place is now hollow,

it lingers in every corner of my mind.

All I could do is to miss her presence,

cherishing what she left behind,

those bittersweet moments,

that brought both comfort and chaos.

Chasing a missed train is foolish,

there's only pain in the pursuit.

Some people are like time,

once they pass, they become the past.

I do not want to judge her,

what happened was meant to happen.

She is the one I loved the most in this whole world,

and I only wish she gets the best in life.

In the stillness of my silence,

I realise how deeply I was tied to her.

My happiness rested in her presence

and her absence pains every single moment.

By

Sanji-Paul Arvind

**Do not judge my life based on my poems; My Poems and my life are 2 different things.

Her Name in My Zodiac ♑︎

She is the missing part of my life,

the gods forgot to write in my fate.

But the universe remembered,

it still stands as a witness for me.

Her image came into my eyes,

and slowly she reached my heart,

to become the rhythm of my heartbeat,

a pulse that will carry her to its end.

I made her my only priority,

she turned away from my love.

Maybe it was not our fault,

maybe it was just time and situation.

She saw me like a stranger,

but my soul never did.

She felt something I cannot explain,

as this meeting was written before.

Maybe she hated me for being nice,

for which I paid the price.

She thought I had no aim in life,

but she’ll never know my sacrifices.

She may never understand,

that even my zodiac sign,

carries her name in some way,

I only wish she could see it.

By

Sanji-Paul Arvind

**Do not judge my life based on my poems; My Poems and my life are 2 different things.

If Not Her, Her Memories Will Do

I felt I was lucky to meet her,

and meeting her was written in my fate.

My life was very cold before,

but after meeting her, everything changed.

The engine of my heart started again,

after a very long time of silence.

I was a prisoner of my own darkness,

and she brought light into my life.

I was like a ship without direction,

just moving without purpose.

She came and changed my path,

showing me how to live again.

But just when I learned to live,

she was no longer there.

As if she came only to redirect my life,

and to disappear like an angel.

I never told her, how much I loved her,

it was too big for words,

I could not explain it properly.

There were no words strong enough.

I was never afraid of being alone,

until she came into life and changed everything.

Now I feel I cannot live without her,

but she is not here anymore.

She left for her own reasons,

but I kept finding ways to stay.

Because for me, she was everything,

my favorite one, my special one, my twin soul.

Now she is not here,

still her memories are with me,

and that is how I am live saying,

If not her, her memories will do.

By

Sanji-Paul Arvind

**Do not judge my life based on my poems; My Poems and my life are 2 different things.

Within The Walls of My Heart

I could have been many things to her,

but I chose only to love,

as it would last forever,

and only time can measure.

Eternity is all I know,

but if there is something beyond that,

then that is how far my love is,

only the universe will know.

I never knew I could love her so much,

if I had known, I would not have seen her.

Now that she is not in my life,

It gives me only pain and sorrow.

I wish I could steal her,

from my dreams into real life,

or go into dreams where she is,

and stay with her forever.

I had built walls around my heart,

and she became the first to break them.

All my love flowed towards her,

but she moved away from it.

When I made a home for her within my heart,

the walls came back again, stronger.

After her, there is no place for others,

as I'm unable to break them.

By

Sanji-Paul Arvind

**Do not judge my life based on my poems; My Poems and my life are 2 different things.

Love Undying

In her sorrow, I find some peace,

In her tears, her smile does not cease.

In the silence, I hear her voice,

Even in pain, she is my choice.

In her storm, I feel calm inside,

In her heartbreak, I try to hide.

In her absence, I still see her here,

And in her darkness, she shines clear.

In her shadow, I see her like a sun,

In losing her, my love will never be done.

In the loss, I still hold on,

Keeping her heart when she is gone.

In all this pain, I still stay strong,

As her memories help me move along.

Though her love was not for me,

I had her once, that is enough to be.

I carry her in my paining heart,

A heavy burden I won’t depart.

Even her wounds feel like a prize,

For my love for her never dies.

By

Sanji-Paul Arvind

**Do not judge my life based on my poems; My Poems and my life are 2 different things.

My Revenge

I will take her away,

to an unknown corner of my heart.

I will bind and torture her with care,

and love, until she suffocates.

My revenge is to hug her tight,

whenever she comes in my sight.

I will make her feel breathless,

with my love, nothing else.

I wanted to hold her hand one day,

and silently take her far away,

Far from this world's noisy crowd

where it's just us, alone and proud.

A world that exists only for us,

no judgement, no complains no fuss.

Just her and me, and love that stays,

a dream I will miss for all my days.

I do not know what good I did before,

to meet her in this life once more.

I do not know what wrong I did there,

that she slipped away like water in air.

She made me lose my mind in pain,

my thoughts now wander, all in vain.

That is her after effect on me,

something I'll live with endlessly.

By

Sanji-Paul Arvind

**Do not judge my life based on my poems; My Poems and my life are 2 different things.

When My Heart Bent

My "I love you",

Was never 'Don't leave me',

Nor did it mean 'You are mine',

It meant, I cherish you, but I do not own you.

I was never bargaining,

My love stood strong,

even when it wasn’t returned,

With empty hands, I was stunned.

My anger, and withdrawal

was never hate,

it was me saying, “I release you”,

to be wherever she wanted to be.

But deep within my mind,

lies a creepiest demon, it's not kind.

It wants to crawl often,

only to play with old emotions.

I knew from the start,

I will be broken by this.

Still, I trusted my heart

unafraid, believing she was the one.

I never thought she could be my ending,

Yet there I was, left alone

while my heart bent to her feet,

until it almost broke me.

By

Sanji-Paul Arvind

**Do not judge my life based on my poems; My Poems and my life are 2 different things.

My World She Is

I would never need the wide bright sky,

her heart is enough for me to live in.

I would never need the sun,

her face brightens my world.

I don't need the night sky,

her dark hair will make me sleep.

I don't need the moon,

her glow stays with me in the dark.

I would never need the stars,

the sparkle in her eyes shines brighter.

I would never need a rainbow,

her smile gives me happiness.

I don't need sleep,

because my eyes can't be without her image.

I don't need dreams,

if she is not in them.

I would never need a volcano,

for her anger can burn me completely.

I would never need rivers,

as her tears will drown me.

I don't need a cool breeze,

her breath gives me comfort.

I don't need an ocean,

her love is deeper than it.

I would never need hell,

her hatred is more dangerous for me.

I would never need heaven,

because with her, I am already in it.

By

Sanji-Paul Arvind

**Do not judge my life based on my poems; My Poems and my life are 2 different things.

My Final Destination

I roamed this earth,

I failed more than I won.

Name, pride, money, and desire,

Like every man, I chased and lost.

Truth and lies walked together,

Deception and betrayal came from trusted hands.

Happiness stayed for a short time,

Sorrow became my forever friend.

Family, friends, enemies, colleagues,

I faced everyone, life sent my way.

Many left by nature's rule,

But one person took full control.

In truly loving her, I lost myself,

And in her silence, I broke apart.

Every road I walk ends in her memory,

Every breath whispers her name.

Heaven never accepted me,

Hell feels too small for all this pain.

Wherever my body goes in this world,

My destination finally is her soul.

By

Sanji-Paul Arvind

**Do not judge my life based on my poems; My Poems and my life are 2 different things.

How My Words Bleed

I wrote her in ways,

the world would never notice

in pauses, in breaths,

in spaces between words,

where my longing hides.

All of them

my confessions,

I never got to say aloud.

Now every line is a piece of me,

she never cared to keep.

My words suffered in my heart,

breaking themselves into lines,

just to resemble her presence.

They were born in my thoughts.

The silence inside me,

started to speak her name.

Each word bled out of me,

restless and in pain,

searching for a place to hold her.

To love her endlessly,

and to be forgotten quietly,

a single purpose given to me

as if the universe carved into my soul.

When the truth finally settled,

it didn't break me, it rewrote me.

My story without closure,

one she will never see, never feel, never say.

By

Sanji-Paul Arvind

**Do not judge my life based on my poems; My Poems and my life are 2 different things.