The Shape of My Absence

My love is not in closeness,

I chose her each day.

even when I couldn't hold her hands

or see her face.

I carry the weight of everything I never said,

for I loved deeply and still lost.

I gave myself until nothing remained,

trusted fully, only to be broken.

She took a piece of me,

that time refuses to return,

Her love for me is a divine melody,

that plays in the depths of my soul.

She noticed my anger,

but not the pain beneath it,

the wounds she gave, never heals,

the scars would permanently stay.

My soul feels heavier now,

my heartbeat softer, fat away.

I just flow with time

without knowing where it leads.

My silence is full of words,

my heart speaks of them, like thunder.

I hope my absence is visible,

and the space I left still remembers me.

By

Sanji-Paul Arvind

**Do not judge my life based on my poems; My Poems and my life are 2 different things.