Her pain began from desire,
and I kept burning in endless pain.
My mind was always full of her,
and slowly, desire became attachment.
A soft feeling inside my heart
that said, “I need her to feel happy.”
But attachment never comes alone,
it also brings expectations.
I started expecting things from her,
her words, her replies, her care
to fill the emptiness inside me.
But reality was different
and the difference brought sadness,
frustration, and heartbreak.
She looked similar to me,
but our nature was very different.
Slowly, my happiness
started depending on her behaviour,
her responses,
and whether she understood me or not.
When she acted differently,
it hurt me deeply.
Then I understood
that love should be free,
without pressure, demands, or control.
I loved her like she was my destiny,
giving everything while asking for nothing.
Now my love feels quieter,
more open and selfless.
It only wants her happiness and growth,
even if that means letting her go.
My emotions were tied to expectations,
I became dependent on her yes and no.
Her “no” brought me sadness and pain,
while her “yes”
would have felt like heaven.
By
Sanji-Paul Arvind
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