Something Between Us We Couldn’t Name

The greatest suffering is

suffering in silence and in loneliness.

My pain could never be spoken,

even if it did, it may not help understand others.

The depth of her sorrow

lives in the words I keep inside.

Sometimes I feel like

I want to be with her,

as my soul cannot imagine

to live without her.

Though I have met thousands of faces

she is the only one I long to see.

Her presence is the only thing

my soul expects to stay beside.

We were too complicated to become one

and we could never become good friends either,

the relationship we had had was different,

as we never even felt like strangers now.

So, I love her from a place,

where I cannot declare her as my love.

I feel like we crossed a line,

that we were not supposed to,

and we couldn't name our relationship.

The silence speaks in the distance,

all that we wanted to tell each other.

The world cannot know or hear,

what we truly wanted to be.

I loved her for real,

but I now pretend it never happened.

By

Sanji-Paul Arvind