My Edited Version Remains

Everything disappeared with her,

the version of myself

that brought me the utmost happiness,

and the feeling

of having to wait for her.

My heartbreak was surprisingly confusing,

as I knew the relationship wasn't right.

I am grieving a version of my life,

a version of myself

that existed when I was with her.

Now she is partof my identity,

and when everything ended,

parts of my life

also disappeared with her.

I miss being her priority,

when she wanted something from me,

when she chose me

without me having to ask.

I remember all the beautiful moments,

but I don't want that relationship.

I feel sad about losing it,

but I know the breakup was necessary.

I am not stuck because I want her back.

I am stuck in the past,

inside an edited version of myself.

By

Sanji-Paul Arvind